Managing Your New Year's Resolution

What's your New Year's Resolution? Like diets, most people never fully complete their New Year's Resolutions.

For most of us, our resolutions to change and better our life in some way is no more than a wish. We lack the passion and commitment to tenaciously stick to our original plan. In fact most of us never even get to the planning phase of the resolution - we just voice it and then hope that it takes care of itself.

We lie to ourselves too easily. We tell ourselves that we really want to loose weight or to finish college, but in truth we have other desires that we allow to take precedence over our stated goal.

This year look deep inside yourself and decide how you want to make your life better. Then break down that goal into small manageable pieces and put them in order. Instead of expecting yourself to miraculously become a new person, let yourself feel the accomplishment of reaching little related goals every day.

Keeping your motivation high is imperative to reaching your end goal, and to do that you need to feel the pride of accomplishment each and every day. Write down what your daily goal will be and make sure it is easily attainable. Expecting too much of yourself will result in feelings of failure, and will open up the opportunity for self-sabotage.

You can make your resolutions honest and attainable by keeping your baby steps fresh in your mind. Before you know it one day will lead to the next and you will eventually make that change a reality. In the end you will not only feel the joy of having reached your overall goal, but you will have strengthened your self confidence along the way.

Straight No Chaser - 12 Days

Merry Christmas & Other Anti-PC Comments

Merry Christmas Everyone!

Are you insulted? Do you feel offended? Would you like your lawyer to ban me from the internet? Tough. I love the Christmas season and I am not about to stop sharing my Christmas cheer because a few people are thin skinned and way too board.

The truth is that most Americans feel the same way. The people who want to stop us from expressing our Christmas cheer are politicians, big business owners and a small number of attention seekers.

People want to be able to share their joy with others in their own way. And why shouldn't they? No matter how hard I try I am not powerful enough to "make" anyone feel anything. Feeling offended is a choice. To say otherwise is to state that society has more power over you than you have over yourself. It is a weak-willed, victim mentality.

So how do I feel when someone says Happy Hanukkah? I feel happy. I feel free. I feel blessed to live in a country where we all can share our joy and happiness with each other without feeling guilty or offended. How about you?

You Tube Debates and Media Bias

Have you been watching the newest craze in political advertising? Yes, politics has now joined with You Tube, gathering questions from the public instead of having the questions created by left-winged CNN producers. Of course the questions used for the debates are still chosen by the left-winged CNN producers. That became ridiculously apparent during the latest republican You tube debate.

Of the hundreds, perhaps thousands, of video-taped questions sent into You Tube only a handful were chosen. For the democratic debate held earlier this month, the questions focused on the war, medical insurance reform, foreign policy and of course immigration. But for the republican debate the questions chosen were largely about the Bible, gays in the military, guns and "what if" abortion questions.

I found it irritating that the biases of the producers were served instead of focusing on the issues that Americans want to hear about - you know, those things that a president might actually be involved in doing something about.

I also found it irritating to have the audience constantly cheering or booing loudly in the background. It was like having a laugh track in the background attempting to influence the feelings and views of the home audience. It did influence the answers of the candidates, and that was most unfortunate.

OK, this article isn't exactly entertaining, but politics is a huge part of our life, and I believe that expressing disdain for the way the debates were handled is a good way to do my part. I mean, if the media effects our life - and it does - then why not speak up and let them know exactly what they can do better next time.

Expressing yourself without apology is a great way to enjoy your life.

Are Color Changing Cars in our Future?

Imagine, a car that is painted with a special technique that causes the color to change depending on the temperature, the humidity or the amount of light that's hitting it. It isn't science-fiction. In fact the technology has already been created.

Another article just out claims that the new color changing technology will allow you to change your car color at your discretion to the color you desire just by pressing a button. At rest, your car is the original color but once you turn over the engine you have the ability to change the color scheme to whatever you want.

Does this mean I will be able to program my T-bird to have orange and red flames on the hood one day and 60's flowers & peace signs the next? Perhaps, but the actual technology is being created for a higher technological purpose, not for the creative pleasure of car owners. But once the technology is out there, who is to say that Ford might not start equipping their 2010 Mustangs with the colorful new upgrade. Awesome!

I'm old enough to remember our family's first color television, the first handheld calculators (which were huge and could only do rudimentary math for about $400 a shot), and the invention of cell phones (previously referred to as car phones). And I cannot wait to see what the near future has in store for us in this fast changing world of technology. In many ways technology definitely makes life enjoyable.

Mother Nature, Gratitude & Enjoying Life

This is a picture of us at the beautiful Waimea Canyon in Hawaii. I'm the one in shorts, bundled up in my husbands' overcoat. We have several pictures of us at different tourist spots, but they all look pretty much like this one.

Actually it has been a great trip. We spent one beautiful day, in pouring rain, zip lining through the rain forest. Another day was spent at Hanalei Beach watching the muddy rivers pour into the ocean creating brown waves and dirty water. And finally one day was spent in thick fog.

I can't complain - much. It was our choice to come in November and Mother Nature has her own schedule to keep. But in spite of the interesting weather Kauai is still one of the most pleasant places on Earth.

I have repeatedly reminded myself that it is a wonderful blessing just to be here again - this time with my husband & our oldest son. At home my husband has to be at work much of the time, but here I have his undivided attention and that alone is something to be grateful for. My son lives in a different part of the state than we do so spending this time with him is priceless. In fact, when I think about it, there is really nothing to complain about.

Of course Hawaii is expensive. We went to a health food store to buy local beef and it was $9.09 per half pound; so we went elsewhere to buy meat and dinner was a raving success.

Some fellow tourists in a nearby condo have been yelling at each other, and at the child traveling with them, for much of the week. I feel sad for them. In spite of all the wonderful things we have to be grateful for it just seems pointless to allow discontent to block our ability to enjoy life - just the way it comes.

Stupid Criminals

Three teens suspected of burglarizing vehicles were arrested after they attempted to elude a police car by turning into a police station.
_________

Bank Robber returns to bank to open account. 11/25/01: A man without principle attracted a lot of interest after he returned to a Queens bank he had robbed to open up a savings account there, police said. "What a dope!" said one amazed police official, who could barely contain his laughter. "This guy has to get the jackass of the year award. I guess that's why they call them 'criminals' - they're just sometimes really stupid."
_________

ENGLEWOOD, Colo. - A man robbing a bank demanded the money by writing a note on one of his own checks, authorities say. Not surprisingly, he was caught soon afterward.
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MANNING, S.C. - Amber Renee Helton was trying to avoid legal problems by paying a traffic ticket. She ended up behind bars when authorities found out she drove a stolen car to the courthouse to pay it, police said.
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MONROE -- A man and woman robbed a busy Starbucks early yesterday morning and wound up serving coffee through the drive-up window for at least 30 minutes to make additional cash. They then waited until business slowed enough to make a getaway.
________

ELKO, Nev. An off-duty sheriff's deputy was pulled over and charged with driving under the influence — by her husband, a fellow deputy.
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David Posman, 33, was arrested recently in Providence, R.I, after allegedly knocking out an armored car driver and stealing the closest four bags of money. It turned out they contained $800 in PENNIES, weighed 30 pounds each, and slowed him to a stagger during his getaway so that police officers easily jumped him from behind.
________

Drug-possession defendant Christopher Johns, on trial in March in Pontiac, Michigan, said he had been searched without a warrant. The prosecutor said the officer didn't need a warrant because a "bulge" in Christopher's jacket could have been a gun. "That was no gun", said Christopher, who happened to be wearing the same jacket that day in court. He handed the jacket over so the judge could see it. The judge discovered a packet of cocaine in the pocket and laughed so hard he required a five-minute recess to compose himself.
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Oklahoma City -Dennis Newton was on trial for the armed robbery of a convenience store in a district court this week when he fired his lawyer. Assistant district attorney Larry Jones said Newton, 47, was doing a fair job of defending himself until the store manager testified that Newton was the robber. Newton jumped up, accused the woman of lying and then said, "I should of blown your [expletive] head off." The defendant paused, then quickly added, "-if I'd been the one that was there." The jury took 20 minutes to convict Newton and recommend a 30-year sentence.
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STEVENS POINT, Wis. -- A woman didn't have to look far to figure out who likely broke into her home and took a camera from her purse. Police said the burglar left behind his probation and parole card.
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Were the Good-ol-Days All that Good?

Well this week my husband will be bringing home another computer. That will make 4 that are in use in the house and at least 2 that are in storage. My husband and my son love to put together their "dream" computer about once a year. They do it that often because after a year the current computer is no longer their "dream" computer.

That is just fine however, because it seems to me that after about a year something is bound to go wrong with the home-built dream. My husband blames me for going to sites with bugs and I protest that our bug detector should protect us from all pests. I believe they do. I also believe that these crazy overly-powered home built computers are also overly-sensitive resulting in their short lives.

This time I begged my husband to just buy a computer that was already put together the way he wanted. Of course the Del commercials had me believing that anything they wanted could be built into a computer and shipped out. But that just isn't the way my husband does things. No, he did do as I asked, he bought a new computer. But after he and my son got hold of it they decided that it needed much more than it came with after all.

"I have 8 more gigs that I can add to it," my husband said with that "Tim Taylor" look in his eye.

"And I think I have a better sound card," added my son. So they went to work. That was 2 weeks ago and I still don't have my new computer. Consequently I'm still using this old computer with Linux and Ubuntu that doesn't support flash. It can be maddening.

My web site is all but down and I can't get to it because Dreamweaver is on the other system. I can't add pictures to my blogs because this computer doesn't have my photos on it. I have my flash drive, but this computer has no way to read it. I suppose I could read a book - I'd rather read one on my PDA but my granddaughter wiped my hard drive and I can't back it up with the Ubuntu system.

So here I sit, waiting for my life to get back to normal. Sometimes I wonder how I ever existed without a computer - and yes, I'm old enough to remember those simpler times.

Religion, Archeology and Common Sense

Have you ever noticed that whenever an archaeologist unearths a new discovery their instant conclusion is that whatever they found must have been used by the ancients for religious purposes? Now I understand that religion has been a cultural foundation for most civilizations throughout history, but come on, isn’t it possible that just like us, the ancients also had lives and customs that weren’t centered around their spiritual beliefs?

Recently My husband built a pergola around our front patio. We live in a very windy area so in the true “Tim Taylor” manner, he built it to withstand hurricane force winds. Afterwards we stood back to look at it and joked that hundreds of years from now, some archaeologist will dig it up and proclaim it to be an ancient religious site. Then he will uncover the fire-pit in the center and insist that the local villagers had made sacrifices to their gods on this very site.

We looked at each other and chuckled. Then my husband said, “Now I think I’ll start working on my rock wall down by the garden." We chuckled again - Stone Hinge!

URL Registration Sites Reviewed - Go Daddy, Google & More

It used to be that everyone thought that Register.com and Network solutions were the only inexpensive URL registering sites out there. At $35 a year for each domain name you owned. In the beginning it seemed like the only way to get your own URL. Now however there are several very good URL registration sites to choose. Most of them are less expensive than Register and many offer top-notch services and options. Here is a review of some of them.

www.godaddy.com is rising to the top fast with its fabulous customer service and inexpensive anual fee it is quickly becoming one of the fastest growing domain name vendors out there. Their yearly rate is $8.95 and if you transfer your domain from another site they give you a free year.

Here is what a happy customer said:

I signed up for a membership at godaddy.com, then clicked a link that says transfer domains. I entered the domains I wanted to transfer over from register.com, paid the transfer fee (like 7.95), and then told register that I wanted to transfer. Within 2 days I got a telephone call from Go Daddy thanking me and asking if there was anything more they could do to help me - awesome customer service!

Another inexpensive service is I&I.com which offers prices according to the extension you choose. the typical extensions .com .org and .net are starting at $5.99 per year and right now there is an offer of only $2.99per year if you choose a .us extension. They also offer web hosting and starter pages for beginners or those without the correct software to start your own. I don't know anyone who has used I&I yet but if you have tried it I would love to hear from you.

networksolutions.com I believe was the original URL vendor on the web. I started with them in 1996 and used them for years until I discovered register.com. At the time I switched register was offering a better deal but now, Network Solutions is offering tried and true services for only $9.96 per month. That may be enough to make this old customer return to them. If price per year is your only priority you can still find less expensive vendors out there, but I can tell you from experience that few have the offers and options that are connected with Network Solutions, especially if you are a high-volume webmaster.

Google haqs also started URL registration at $10.00 per month which of course comes with automatic Google calendar, instant messaging and other Google widgets. From the information I gathered it looks like they the URL's they offer come through other vendors i.e. if you want to sign up for example.com you may get the URL of buy.example.com instead. Google is new with this so I would advise you to wait until they have exactly what the public wants before signing up.

There are plenty of other site out there who profess to have great services with low prices for registering your domain name. Here are links to just a few.

http://www.active-domain.com/ - $2.85 per year
http://www.mydomain.com/ - $827 per year or $7.99 to transfer from another vendor
http://www.rwgusa.net/ - Worldwide Domains available
http://www.koredomains.com/?gclid=CLLNms2QzI4CFShVYQodEnmLDA Differing rates, Bulk URL transfer options.

As always, check out the vendor carefully and check to see if their low prices are only for the first year, to lure you in. You don't want to be in a position to have to switch again next year because of a crooked add campaign. And of course, read the contract carefully before giving them your credit card information!

Are We All Bigots?

Technorati Profile

There is an interesting game show that started this summer called "Without Prejudice." The host is a Clinical Psychologist who works with CNN from time to time.

Each game has 5 contestants who don't do anything. They are sequestered in a soundproof room backstage. On stage are 5 people from various walks of life who have the job of determining which of the 5 contestants "deserves" to be awarded $25,000. After each elimination the panelists see a brief clip of each of the contestants talking about their life. And with each new piece of information they receive they have to decide who should be voted off next, until they are left with one person - the winner.

Although the name of the show is Without Prejudice, it is glaringly obvious that all of the panelists are overflowing with judgments, fallacious assumptions and religious, moral or other prejudices. Few admit to their own bigoted or prejudicial feelings, but the truth is that participating in such a forum would not be possible without personal judgments. This begs the question, Are we hypocrites when we say we are non-judgmental or tolerant of others' lifestyles?

I found the show to be an incredible study into the microcosm of humanity and how all of us are judgmental and biased from time to time, without merit or vindication.

I think this show helps the viewer think about their personal biases. It may even help people to get real about how they form their own "first impressions."

Leave a Legacy of Love - Grandparenting

Few things in life are sweeter than spending time with grandchildren. Sure, like any children, they can wear you out, defy your sensibilities and create a mess in the living room faster than the speed of sound. But over all, grandchildren are the frosting on the cake and the twinkle in their grandparent's eye.

Having children was a wonderful experience for me. Now 50, I wish I could go back and change a few things here and there, but for the most part, I love being a mother. Now that my kids are grown however, there is a part of me that still yearns for that wonderful feeling of a child putting their arms around my neck and letting me know that I am loved. My granddaughter fills that yearning need for me. And for some unexplainable reason, I seem to be able to cherish it so much more now than I did when I was a young mother.

Perhaps it is part of getting on in years that make you appreciate each golden moment you have with them. Or maybe it is knowing that loving them is your only real responsibility. As a parent you have so many other things that enter the mix like constantly thinking about how your parenting skills are going to affect them in the long run, or having to carry on with life's other chores while attending to your child's physical, spiritual, mental and social needs. Parenting can be overwhelming.

But Grand-parenting is one of the most rewarding jobs I have ever had. My granddaughter is still young, but I imagine that eventually I will be able to impart my years of experience and acquired wisdom with her when she gets her heart broken for the first time or when she is last to be picked for volleyball. I imagine that she and I will develop a bond based on unconditional love and sharing that isn't encumbered by the moments of frustrations that can come with actually living with family members.

It's funny to think about life as a grandparent. As a parent I was still young enough to feel immortal. Now I think about my health and work at taking care of myself because I want to be around to participate in my grand-children's lives for as long as possible.

My mom has been blessed with many great-grandchildren. Family, what a concept.

Dogs pees upside down

A Chinese woman says her pet dog has taken to peeing upside down.

The woman says her pet dog has taken to peeing upside down. 18-month-old Baby began peeing in the new position just three months ago

“He used to pee as other dogs do. But one day I found him putting both hind legs up onto the tree to pee," she told East Asia Business News.

"I thought maybe that was only for the one day. But from then on, unexpectedly, he would pee in that acrobatic position.”

Dogs pees upside down

A Chinese woman says her pet dog has taken to peeing upside down.

A Chinese woman says her pet dog has taken to peeing upside down. Mrs Chen, of Changchun city, says 18-month-old Baby began peeing in the new position just three months ago /Lu Feng

Mrs Chen, of Changchun city, says 18-month-old 'Baby' began peeing in the new position just three months ago.

“He used to pee as other dogs do. But one day I found him putting both hind legs up onto the tree to pee," she told East Asia Business News.

"I thought maybe that was only for the one day. But from then on, unexpectedly, he would pee in that acrobatic position.”

So, Ya gotta have a strange and funny dog story once in a while to make life laughable. In fact, sitting down and laughing for a 30 minute show of funny animal film clips is a great way to alleviate despair and the everyday doldrums that come along from time to time.

Go find something to make yourself laugh; you will feel better.

Five Friends You Need to Have to Enjoy Life

Writer Edna Buchanan once said "Friends are the family we choose for ourselves." In our busy lives it is becoming common to relegate our friends to an occasional email and a Birthday card. But Mental Health Experts agree that having a close-knit group of friends with who you feel safe and energized, you are much more likely to give yourself a much higher grade in the "Life Happiness" Scale.

Here are the five types of friends that you need to include in your ring of close friends in order to get most of your social needs met.

1. The Uplifter
This is the friend who really listens to you and eagerly supports you in your decisions. She can give you 3 reasons why your glass is half full instead of half empty. Talking with her is a good way to verbalize your ideas and she will help you feel creative and intelligent for having thought of them.

2. The Travel Buddy
It is a fact that women have much more fun traveling together without men than they ever had with a man. This friend must be OK with silences, able to make the best out of a wrong turn and someone who has a bit of adventure in her that can make her a little quirky once in a while - every holiday needs someone to liven it up a bit.

3. The consistently truthful
This is someone who has tact, who can speak the truth with love instead of jealousy or males. When you find her, you'd be smart to seek out this woman's perspective. She is the one who will not be afraid to tell you that Great Aunt Jane will hate that T-shirt as her souvenir.

4. The Girl Who Just Wants to Have Fun
This friend is easy going and can pour over nick-nacks in a country store for hours and never get board. She is the shopping antithesis to men. She is the one eager to put on her size 42 bathing suit and jump into the spa or to have a picnic under the stars She makes you smile and step out of your comfort zone once in a while

5. The Unlikely Friend
This is a friend that at first didn't seem like they would fit the group, but after getting to know her you realize that she represented a completely different view of the world that you do and you love to interact with her and learn more of her world.


To fully enjoy your life you must allow yourself to have a varied arrangement of friends with whom to share your life.

Woman Bitten by Dead Gopher - Life is One Big Joke

I heard about a new type of Yoga the other day called "Laugh Yoga." Essentially a group of people get together and start laughing without cause. By the end of the session most are laughing at the silliness of their own laughter and they are feeling better, more relaxed and optimistic about life.

Today, if I had known where to join such a group, I would have. I started out this morning late for an appointment. I grabbed my shoes and started towards the door thinking that I could put them on once I arrived at the Dr.s office. As I loped across my living room rug I stepped on something both slimy and sharp - a dead gopher head and its kidney. My cats had left me a surprise gift.

After washing the guts off of my foot I again headed off to my appointment. When I arrived I was told that I was not late at all, but I was actually 3 days early. I laughed, then I told them my gopher story and all of us had a good long laugh - including an older couple in the waiting area who had over heard the story.

I guess I didn't really need to join a "Yoga Laughter" group after all, my life is silly enough to create my own laugh therapy. And believe it or not, so is yours. All of us have a choice every day to go about our business with a smile on our face or to choose to continually look at the world through a serious lens.

Why waste your life feeling pessimistic and sullen when you can live every moment with joy and laughter? There is a reason people look better when they smile. Even Mother Nature wants us to be happy.

Being Grateful Can Improve your Life

"Gratitude is the first step on the Simple Abundance path, or it just won't work. Simplicity, order, harmony, beauty and joy—all the other principles that can transform your life will not blossom and flourish without gratitude."
— Sarah Ban Breathnach

Several years ago Oprah did a show about being grateful for everything in your life - even those things that seemed troublesome. She claimed that having a "Attitude of Gratitude" was part of what has brought her happiness and success. She said:

"Accept with an open heart whatever is going on in your life right now. And whenever you can't think of something to be grateful for, remember your breath. With each breath you take, you can say, "I am still here."

People all over the world began making lists of things they were grateful for and it didn't take long before they were writing to Oprah, telling her how that simple daily habit had changed their life.

It is true that changing your attitude to a positive frame of mind can change your whole life. Becoming positive instead of negative will attract positive people and positive events to you. And you will be more likely to recognize a positive opportunity when you are in a positive frame of mind.

While you are making your list of things to be grateful for, make a mental note of those areas of your life that can be changed from a negative to a positive. Make a commitment to stop gossiping, judging others, or expecting that others should live to your standards. Replace those old habits with positive ones. Look for the positive in others, be compassionate, and be grateful that everyone around you is a unique individual.

The Family Pet & Mental Health

I know a woman who's therapist wrote her a prescription for a cat. The therapist thought that the cat would bring the woman comfort and companionship during a difficult divorce. The woman got the cat and for 20 years she was able to use the cat's expenses as a tax write off.

Pets can be great therapy. They love unconditionally and they require little more than food, shelter and love. Another wonderful side effect of having a pet is that caring for and connecting with a pet teaches the owner empathy and compassion. Children who grow up with a pet in the home are more likely to learn these lessons than those who do not.

However getting a pet while children are under the age of 5 can be a risky situation for the pet. Although children will eventually learn empathy by interacting with a pet the learning process takes time and it is important for parents to closely supervise the interactions between the child and the pet.

When the child does something that hurts the pet it is important for the parent to react in a way that helps the child understand that the pet has both physical and emotional feelings. Children as young as 2 years old can begin to understand the connection between hitting (or pulling a tail) and the sensation of pain in others. The parent just needs to take time to explain it calmly.

So go ahead and get that family pet. But don't expect the child to be responsible for it. Just help them learn how to love it.

Learning About What Makes You Happy - and how to relieve daily stress

Today I spent time with a client who was beginning to feel as if she had lost control over her ability to run her life. Life was too busy and every aspect of her business seemed far too underdeveloped and she couldn't see the light at the end of the tunnel.Because she has issues with instant gratification I tried to help her understand how relieving it would be to remove some stress factor's from her life that cause or add to the stress in ones self or in the home. Findind ways to eliminate chaos in her home or office might be one way to relieve stress improve her level of confidence and thereby limit helping her to find quiet time to herself where she cam rejuvenate for a moment.

One of the best ways for people to relieve stress is to have at least on really good hobby. Fixing up old cars, running, biking, getting away for a weekend with your wife or working on a project for your special someone all might be great ways to release stress in your life. Instead of focusing on how hard life is for you, begin thinking about how you can make yourself more productive by re-energizing your own batteries a little everyday. Even if reading a novel is your therapy, arrange to do id for 10-15 minutes a day during what otherwise may have been a stressful period.

The problem is that when we are in the midst of the ongoing chaos, we tell ourselves that we don't have time for a hobby. NOT TRUE! You are just too busy being busy and the thought of tending to your own needs may cause you to feel guilty, unworthy, not-good-enough. But settling into a couple of relaxing activities twice a day can significantly improve your work productivity and your ability to function at home and in the world.

Family: Don't Waste Your Life Being Angry

What is it about families that make it so easy to hold a grudge and so hard to let by-gones be by-gones? Friends may stay around for a long while, but even our best friends are rarely with us forever. On the other hand, our family will always be our family. We can refuse to speak to some of them and we can choose to punish them with our anger, but they will still influence a large part of our life. Even "disowning" a family member can't erase the impact they have on our life.

Overcoming our anger means acknowledging our hurt, and it is the emotional pain that is at the bottom of most family squabbles. We humans have a tendency to ignore our pain and replace it with feelings we feel more comfortable with such as superiority and pride.

It is much easier to elevate our own importance in order to reduce the importance of someone close to us. But doing so never eases the emotional pain for long. Emotional pain has a way of festering and then popping out in all kinds of destructive ways - one of which is bitterness. When we choose to ignore our hurt feelings we are inviting negative feelings into our life that can infect all of our other relationships.

Our family members are not so different than we are. In fact they are probably more like us than we care to admit, which is another reason why we have difficulty with some of them. We hate being constantly reminded of our own shortcomings and so we often criticize family for things we hate about ourselves. Again, it seems easier than looking at the truth about ourself.

Forgiveness is a much misunderstood concept, but it is one of the most powerful and constructive things we can do to rid ourself of a bitter and destructive lifestyle. Forgiveness requires a couple of very important abilities, releasing our own stubborn pride, and accepting our role in the conflict. It requires us to move beyond the prison that hate keeps us in and choosing to grow beyond our hurt and anger.

It requires a lot of conscious effort, but the outcome will be worth it. And what can be better than being OK with family events instead of being continually stressed by them?

Don't Let Negativity Become Your Identity

Ever meet someone who seems to be perpetually negative, grouchy or just plain unhappy? Have you ever been that person? All of us have moments of disenchantment with life, but allowing those moments to drag on into a life long pattern is a choice. Ask any child if they want to grow up to be a negative grouch and they will tell you NO! And yet some of us at some point in our life choose that role as our identity.

Perpetual unhappiness is not a personality type. It is something we do have control of. Sometimes when I tell my clients this, they complain that I just don't understand what they have been through. Truth is, I do know how life can seem to continually deal you a bad hand. But that doesn't mean that you have to allow those bad hands to forever cloud your ability to enjoy life.

Every day when you get out of bed you have a choice; you can put on a smile and attack the day head on, determined to do what you can to make it great, or you can let the darkness control your destiny. The solution is simple, however, implementing that solution takes a determined spirit. I never say it will be easy, but I promise you that if you do your best every day to smile, and do all that you can do to keep the negative attitudes away, you will begin to enjoy your life.

So I'm asking you, Do you want to grow up to be negative and unhappy? Or would you rather reach out and grab for all the happiness you desire? Determine today to make that answer a reality! You can do it.

Oldies But Goodies

Some things just never get old. That is especially true for classic movies, I Love Lucy reruns and people you love. OK people might age, but when you love somebody their aging process is rarely a detriment. After all you are getting older too.

Perhaps that is why we have such a love for all things nostalgic. We remember things from our youth and for a moment we feel young again. We smile as we momentarily re-live a pleasant part of our past.

My mom, who is in her 80's, still stands up to dance when she hears big-band music. My husband loves to relax and watch Star Trek reruns - the original 60's version. He practically has the episodes memorized, but seeing them again and again does something for him. It makes him happy. I have re-connected with several old friends on Classmates.com over the last few years and it is always fun to reminisce with them about the "good-ol-days."

Enjoying life isn't always about creating new memories; sometimes enjoyment comes in old but well loved packages. Of course if we are to make sure that "today" eventually becomes one of the "good-ol-days," we have to make choices that create happiness in our life today. Most of the time that entails laughing at ourselves when we look silly, letting the little pleasures become important and remembering to appreciate everyone in our life. The crazy woman who lives next door might seem intolerable today, but someday, she might be the impetus for a great story.

Look around at your life and discover what you otherwise would have taken for granted today. Appreciate it, celebrate it and share it with someone you love.

Experience Everyday - While it Lasts

Today I'm going to spend the afternoon with a friend and her husband. I tend to spend a good amount of time visiting friends, but today is different. My friend's husband is dying of cancer, and he is not expected to last the weekend. Not a very uplifting day to be writing about how to enjoy one's life. But in fact it is.

You see, 3 months ago Jay was healthy and fit. He was always busy working out in their lush yard, growing flowers for church on Sunday, making furniture for his lovely home, or playing his saxophone. So you see, today writing about enjoying your life is particularly poignant. We never know when we or a loved one will be called home. And for that reason, it is so important to treat each day like a precious jewel.

It is so easy to become complacent in life, to take each day for granted and to forget that every moment that passes is gone forever. Make a decision today to make each moment count. Tomorrow will come soon enough.

Keeping Your Digital Photos Safe

One of the best ways to enjoy your life is to take lots of pictures. Now you don't need to read a blog to figure this out, but with technology exploding into the fast lane I thought it was appropriate to mention a few ways to keep your memories safe and available.

1. Most people are using digital cameras these days and one mistake we can make is to neglect to get prints of the pictures we want to fawn over from time to time. Sure it is nice to have them all saved on your screen saver but there are times that you'll want to have them available to take to parties and family functions - so you can let others enjoy them too. (Yes I'm one of those grandmothers who shows complete strangers pictures of my grand baby).

2. Heaven forbid you should have something go wrong with your computer and loose all your precious photos. Make sure you have your photos backed up either on hardware or by using an online photo keeper such as Costco or Walmart. There are a lot of sites out there but if you keep your photos on a site that can also print them for you, it will be a lot easier to order prints.

3. Send Grandma all your wonderful family photos via email or web site. That way even if you loose your copy you will have access to them - Grandmothers never delete their precious photos!

4. Remember to upload your pictures to your computer from your camera frequently so that you don't accidentally erase them. And do your best to be organized about where on the computer you place them. We lost a whole days worth of priceless family photos (which we were solely responsible for) and my family hasn't forgiven me yet. My husband finally found them on an old hard drive but we were really lucky that we didn't loose them permanently.

Technology has made some things easier but you have to develop different habits to ensure that your time and efforts aren't wasted.

What the Hail?

You won’t believe this story – but it’s true. It was one of “those” days today.

After getting home late from a tiring day in the city I walked the 1/8th mile jaunt to my mailbox. There was a break in the rain and I figured it was now or never. I tucked the huge bundle of mail under one arm and held up a lantern with the other so I could see the numbers on the cold steel combination lock which secures our gate.

My fingers were stiff and slow to find the right combination. Just as I got the numbers set in place it started to rain. Quickly I wrapped the the lock through the large ranch style gate, flipped the numbers and turned with the intention of scurrying up the hill before getting drenched; but before I stepped away I realized that I hadn’t placed the lock around both the post and the gate. So, in the rain, with chilled fingers, I held up the lantern once again and struggled to re-enter the code. Then, it began to hail.

I tried to hurry, but that only slowed me down. So, patiently I concentrated on the numbers and tried to forget the hail that was now large and heavy. Finally, I re-locked the gate and turned to go back up the driveway, but as I stepped away the lantern flew out of my hand and crashed against the post. In my narrow minded, concentrated effort, I had wound the steel cord through the handle of my lantern before re-locking the gate.

By now the hail had whitened my hair, flown down my neckline (brrrr!) and was stinging my wet hands as it hit my frigid skin. Frustrated, I thought of leaving the lantern attached to the gate until morning. Instead, again I suffered hail, cold and now, no lantern to illuminate the numbers, I re-opened the lock, withdrew my lantern, re-locked the gate for the 3rd time and finally, again, I turned to go up the hill. All this time my trusty dog had been by my side, but I had forgotten about her and as I turned I stepped on her. She yelped, I jumped, landed in a puddle and lost my grip on the mail under my arm which quickly fell into the watery ditch next to the gate.

So there I was, in the dark with my wet dog, hail stuck to my hair, on my knees, searching a ditch for mail that was probably all marked “occupant.”

As I turned for the last time toward the house, I had to laugh. I couldn’t wait to tell my husband what had just happened. Surely he would think I made it all up – but I didn’t.

Hope your day was just as fun.